September 16th, 2010 | by Your Editor | published in Analysis, Massive Nights
Dudes. Totally gross outside again. Sucks. So, now that it’s going to be disgusting outside for 11 straight months, we seriously suggest getting your video game skills back in order. This weekend is the perfect time to start. As famous local person Dave “Portland” Knows points out, this weekend is the Retro Gaming Expo, a veritable slop-bucket [...]
September 14th, 2010 | by Your Editor | published in Analysis
Here it is, folks: The end of days. Everyone’s power is out in Portland, and soon people will be eating their pets and carpets and fingers for sustenance. Hunker down! Um, no. Some folks don’t have power in, what, the northeast? Boise-Elliott? A few people are without power right now, apparently. We don’t know why. Let’s [...]
September 10th, 2010 | by Your Editor | published in Art/Culture, Features
It’s kind of old news now, but for the record, the folks behind the Portland stereotype spoof show “Portlandia” say the show won’t make fun of Portlanders. Sure. You bet. Last month or whenever, we predicted that Portlandia would give the rest of the country ample reason to laugh their asses off at Portland and its fine [...]
September 8th, 2010 | by Tyler | published in Analysis
Apparently there are really old houses in Astoria. Besides that and the Maritime museum (yeah, I went)…there is absolutely nothing to do in Astoria. I feel so bad for the kids there. The big concert of the weekend was held at the hotel coffee shop of the Commodore, an “Ace Hotel” wanna be, seriously, these [...]
September 7th, 2010 | by Your Editor | published in Analysis, Sex/Strippers
We love writing about strip clubs here on SM, and we so rarely get to do it. So when we have to write about strip clubs because they totally burned the fuck down over the weekend, it really sucks. Double sucks. Fire fighters began fighting the blaze at Pussycats, Beaverton’s finest skin joint, at around [...]
September 3rd, 2010 | by Cooking Asshole | published in Features, Food/Drink
Tanuki is a fucking bar, not a damn restaurant. It is a place for heavy drinking and boisterous socialization. Profanities and tales of debauchery still linger in the air from evenings past. The inexpensive small plate menu is only an accent to the ambiance and it goes above and beyond it’s role. Let’s check it out: I [...]
September 3rd, 2010 | by Your Editor | published in Analysis, Sporting Life
Well, adios, minor leagues. The Timbers played their final home game last night before being promoted to the majors next season. That should bring a mixed bag of family-friendly bullshit, awful logos, greater attendance and better competition. But the Army and others can worry about that when the time comes. Last night, the north end [...]